everyone believes.

I have a problem.

I'm a social work student who doesn't really want to be a social worker. By my definition of social work, and by what i believe to be true about the history and the values of the profession - yes, I do want to be a social worker. But, by the definition and the presentation of the profession that i have received thus far in my education - I just don't.

I've been reconfiguring things that I love and that I believe, things that I want out of life and what I would love to help others experience. I think social work matches that list.. but my problem lies in the fact that there is a major disconnect between my definition and what I feel is important in regard to this profession and what my colleagues would deem important. Maybe I am still very new to the field (I am) and maybe I do wrestle with a lot of doubt about myself and my ability or desire to do this work (I do) but - I still worry that maybe, I might be in the wrong place. And, to my experience, it's generally not a very good thing for someone in the second semester of a graduate degree to feel as if they are in the wrong field entirely.

So, here's what I believe to be true about life.

1. I believe in restoration. I believe that no matter where someone has been and what they have been through, restoration is possible and a new life can be experienced. If the individual is willing, I believe that emotional, spiritual and physical restoration can be accomplished. Life is always worth continuing to live and there is always a chance to begin again.

2. I believe in community. I believe that a group of people who come together with a unified heart and love for one another can accomplish amazing things - both individually and on a macro level.

3. I believe in the goodness of people. We are all human, we all suffer, we all fail, we all struggle - but I believe that humanity was created in the image of God and that there is nothing evil about the image of the creator.

4. I believe that laughter is the best medicine. In all circumstances and in all things - a great laugh with a great friend can move mountains.

5. I believe in equality. Because all of humanity was created in the image of God, we are all equal. No one is better, no one is less. Not everyone is granted an equal opportunity for freedom or success, but everyone should be. Everyone should be treated with respect, regardless.

6. I believe in suffering, and I believe in hope. I don't know if mankind will ever be without suffering, or if we will ever be able to explain it, but I believe that hope is what will heal the pain of suffering. I believe that there will always be hope, even if it remains unseen, it's always there.

And what can I hope to accomplish in this life?

1. Family. To continue relationship with the family I was born into and blessed abundantly with, and to build a life with the family that I will one day create. My biggest desire remains to be to find love and friendship with someone whom I want to spend the rest of my life with and to create a life and a family with that person. To be able to experience the joy of raising children who believe in the goodness of people and who are not afraid to come to terms with their own beliefs. As much as I hate to admit it, I cannot wait to be a wife and a mother, and I hope that I will be able to experience it.

2. To be a voice for those who do not have their own voice. I cannot imagine a more fulfilling life than the one spent serving others. I hope to advocate and work for rights, justice and restoration for the least of the world.

3. To write, speak and educate people on issues surrounding human rights and social justice. To bring awareness to those who have been given a privilege and hopefully help them to realize the importance of their role in creating a more just world.

4. To travel. I want to see the world, experience it, taste it, and live it. There is no price to be placed on traveling and experiencing life first-hand, especially outside of one's own context.

5. To promote peace and reconciliation between warring individuals and people groups.

6. To see the Church truly become the Church that it is meant to be. And to be a part of it.

7. To eat as much delicious food as I possibly can and to enjoy every bite.

8. To continue on my own self-discovery and adventure. I hope to keep seeking peace within my own soul and always seek more - more joy, more knowledge and more experiences.

At the end of the day, life is what you make it. Life is a journey and an experience, and it cannot be whittled down to one specific time or one degree that I'm working on. I cannot define myself as simply an MSW or a social worker. I am so many more things than that and I hope to continue to become more when I finish this stage of my education. I think, objectively, my beliefs and my goals match up perfectly with what the profession emphasizes and teaches. What's hard for me to keep my mind off of, though, is that *this* moment defines me and these two years are all I'll ever be.

I need to keep perspective and to remind myself that this is not it. This is far from it.

There is so much more.